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The unwanted gift of grief : a ministry approach / Tim P. VanDuivendyk.

By: Series: Haworth religion and mental healthPublication details: New York : Haworth Pastoral Press, c2006.Description: xv, 192 p. ; 22 cmISBN:
  • 0789029502
  • 9780789029508
  • 0789029499
  • 9780789029492
Subject(s):
Contents:
Foreword / John R. Claypool -- The unwanted gift of grief -- Grief as gratitude, grief as gift -- The wilderness of grief : the way to transformation without facing the pain -- Growth may be limited in dying to the old -- We rise to new life -- Grief : a journey of wondering and wandering in the wilderness -- Everyone grieves differently -- How long will I grieve? -- The effects of family and culture on grieving -- Different pathways through grief : think people, feel people, and act people -- Introverts and extroverts -- Factors that affect the wilderness of grief -- The faith factor -- The need for sojourners : counselors, ministers, and friends -- Sudden loss or slow, unfolding loss -- Rejection and suicide -- The life cycle and development -- Differentiation and enmeshment -- The wilderness of grief -- Unbelievable darkness -- The dynamics of darkness -- Types of shock and disbelief -- Temporary or permanent amnesia -- Frustration in the midst of why? -- Frustration and anger : part of the journey -- Frustration and anger as regret, remorse, or guilt -- Frustration and anger toward others -- Praying for a miracle -- Holy and earthly contracts : hope for healing and cure -- Miracles and saying yes to death and suffering -- Mom's good death -- Advance directives and do-not-resuscitate (DNR) orders -- Abby's good miracle -- Wrestling with sadness and depression -- Sadness and depression : normal parts of healing -- Movement into light and healing -- Signs of when depression is too deep -- Getting help : when, what, and where -- Healing : experiencing the light again -- Caution : euphoria may be ahead! -- What does this healing transformation look or feel like? -- What is this mysterious spirit that transforms us through the wilderness? -- And yet ... we never forget! -- The return of grief : peek-a-boo experiences -- Sojourners in the wilderness : how to help -- Being a sojourner -- What is a sojourner? -- Appendix: The sojourner process guide : walking with another through the wilderness of grief -- Sojourning with those who are in unbelievable darkness -- Sojourning with those who are frustrated and angry -- Sojourning with those praying for a miracle -- Sojourning with those wrestling with sadness and depression -- Sojourning with those in healing and light -- Marriage : tough enough without grief -- Couples and grieving -- Gender differences and grieving -- Complementarity in marriage and grief -- The gift of sexual closeness amid grief -- Appendix: The grief date : a guide for couples and family members -- Ways of making it through the wilderness of grief.
Review: "The Unwanted Gift of Grief is a passionate, practical guide through the grieving process for those who have suffered loss - and those who care for them. Rather than talking people out of their grief and pain as a way to make them feel better, this unique book invites them into the grief and pain as a way to healing, transformation, and hope. Using real and in-depth ministry and counseling conversations, it identifies the journey through the wilderness of grief. This powerful book is equally valuable as a professional guide for ministers and counselors, a training resource for lay ministers and congregations, and as a gift to a grieving person."--BOOK JACKET.
Holdings
Item type Current library Call number Status Date due Barcode
Main Collection John Kinder Theological Library BV4905.3 VAN (Browse shelf(Opens below)) Available J00865874
Main Collection Theology House BV4330 VAN (Browse shelf(Opens below)) Available A0032635X

Includes bibliographical references (p. 185-188) and index.

Foreword / John R. Claypool -- The unwanted gift of grief -- Grief as gratitude, grief as gift -- The wilderness of grief : the way to transformation without facing the pain -- Growth may be limited in dying to the old -- We rise to new life -- Grief : a journey of wondering and wandering in the wilderness -- Everyone grieves differently -- How long will I grieve? -- The effects of family and culture on grieving -- Different pathways through grief : think people, feel people, and act people -- Introverts and extroverts -- Factors that affect the wilderness of grief -- The faith factor -- The need for sojourners : counselors, ministers, and friends -- Sudden loss or slow, unfolding loss -- Rejection and suicide -- The life cycle and development -- Differentiation and enmeshment -- The wilderness of grief -- Unbelievable darkness -- The dynamics of darkness -- Types of shock and disbelief -- Temporary or permanent amnesia -- Frustration in the midst of why? -- Frustration and anger : part of the journey -- Frustration and anger as regret, remorse, or guilt -- Frustration and anger toward others -- Praying for a miracle -- Holy and earthly contracts : hope for healing and cure -- Miracles and saying yes to death and suffering -- Mom's good death -- Advance directives and do-not-resuscitate (DNR) orders -- Abby's good miracle -- Wrestling with sadness and depression -- Sadness and depression : normal parts of healing -- Movement into light and healing -- Signs of when depression is too deep -- Getting help : when, what, and where -- Healing : experiencing the light again -- Caution : euphoria may be ahead! -- What does this healing transformation look or feel like? -- What is this mysterious spirit that transforms us through the wilderness? -- And yet ... we never forget! -- The return of grief : peek-a-boo experiences -- Sojourners in the wilderness : how to help -- Being a sojourner -- What is a sojourner? -- Appendix: The sojourner process guide : walking with another through the wilderness of grief -- Sojourning with those who are in unbelievable darkness -- Sojourning with those who are frustrated and angry -- Sojourning with those praying for a miracle -- Sojourning with those wrestling with sadness and depression -- Sojourning with those in healing and light -- Marriage : tough enough without grief -- Couples and grieving -- Gender differences and grieving -- Complementarity in marriage and grief -- The gift of sexual closeness amid grief -- Appendix: The grief date : a guide for couples and family members -- Ways of making it through the wilderness of grief.

"The Unwanted Gift of Grief is a passionate, practical guide through the grieving process for those who have suffered loss - and those who care for them. Rather than talking people out of their grief and pain as a way to make them feel better, this unique book invites them into the grief and pain as a way to healing, transformation, and hope. Using real and in-depth ministry and counseling conversations, it identifies the journey through the wilderness of grief. This powerful book is equally valuable as a professional guide for ministers and counselors, a training resource for lay ministers and congregations, and as a gift to a grieving person."--BOOK JACKET.

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